Showing posts with label Being loved. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Being loved. Show all posts

Tuesday, 5 August 2025

LET IT BE KNOWN

There is a curious three-part mishnah in the third perek, where Rabbi Akiva (at 3:18) teaches:

חָבִיב אָדָם שֶׁנִּבְרָא בְּצֶֽלֶם, חִבָּה יְתֵרָה נוֹדַֽעַת לוֹ שֶׁנִּבְרָא בְּצֶֽלֶם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: כִּי בְּצֶֽלֶם אֱלֹהִים עָשָׂה אֶת הָאָדָם. חֲבִיבִין יִשְׂרָאֵל שֶׁנִּקְרְאוּ בָנִים לַמָּקוֹם, חִבָּה יְתֵרָה נוֹדַֽעַת לָהֶם שֶׁנִּקְרְאוּ בָנִים לַמָּקוֹם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: בָּנִים אַתֶּם לַייָ אֱלֹהֵיכֶם. חֲבִיבִין יִשְׂרָאֵל שֶׁנִּתַּן לָהֶם כְּלִי חֶמְדָּה, חִבָּה יְתֵרָה נוֹדַֽעַת לָהֶם שֶׁנִּתַּן לָהֶם כְּלִי חֶמְדָּה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: כִּי לֶֽקַח טוֹב נָתַֽתִּי לָכֶם, תּוֹרָתִי אַל תַּעֲזֹֽבוּ

Beloved is man, for he was created in the image [of God]; with greater love it was made known to him that he was created in the image, as it says, "For in the image of God, He made man".

Beloved are Israel, for they are called children of God; with greater love it was made known to them that they are called children of God, as it is stated: "You are children of the Lord your God".

Beloved are Israel, for they were given a precious article; with greater love it was made known to them that they were given a precious article, as it is stated: "I have given you a good purchase—My Torah, do not forsake it".

On the basis that the function of Pirkei Avot as a whole, and the first four perakim in particular, is to spell out lessons of mussar and middot—moral chastisement and ethical instruction—we inevitably have to ask what this mishnah is doing here. God is our creator and our father, as it were, and it is axiomatic that, just as a father loves his children, God loves His children too. But, assuming that we do indeed love our children, does this teaching add anything that can be meaningfully incorporated into our mindsets and, from there, into our behaviour towards others?

The Chasid Yavetz, in his explanation of this mishnah, focuses us on the part of it that is common to all three teachings: the repeated phrase חִבָּה יְתֵרָה נוֹדַֽעַת (“with greater love it was made known”). Whether the subject matter is the creation of man in God’s image, the designation of Israel as God’s children or the gift of them of the Torah, the important consideration here is that God makes it known in each case to the object of His attention. How does He do this? By creating us with the ability to sensitize ourselves to it, to feel the benefit, and to recognize that this benefit is a by-product of God’s great love for us.

Why do we need to know what status or gift we have received from God? According to Lev Avot, one of many commentaries on Avot anthologised in Midrash Shemuel, a status or gift that is conferred on a recipient without their knowledge is like a נֶֽזֶם זָהָב בְּאַף חֲזִיר (“a gold ring in the snout of a pig”, Mishlei 11:22)—it is of an inestimable value of which the recipient is entirely unaware. Because of His great love, however, God breaks the news and allows the recipient to contemplate the meaning and the worth of this divine acquisition.

R’ Chaim Druckman (Avot leBanim) points out that while, for the Chasid Yavetz, this knowledge is something we effectively intuit for ourselves, for Rambam it is information communicated from above, from God Himself. For R’ Druckman it is possible that there is no contradiction since both elements are arguably needed: a divine prod to send us the message, followed by an exercise in internalising the message and making it meaningful in our own lives.

This still begs the question: why is our knowledge of our status and our Torah so important in the first place? Are we not created in God’s image, classified as His children and possessed of His Torah whether we know it or not? There is an obvious real-world answer, one hinted at by the earlier reference to the pig with the gold ring in its snout. We cannot develop or exploit our assets if we don’t know we have them in the first place. We can’t spend money in the bank, or donate it to charity, if we have no idea that it’s there—and the same goes for any talent or aptitude we may have.

God wants us to know He has created us in His image so that we should use His middot as a measuring stick for our own. Equipped with the knowledge that we are His children, we should show Him and our notional siblings a degree of love and respect consonant with His being our father and our fellow Jews being our brothers. And we should learn, guard and keep His Torah because it comes from God, not from ChatGPT.

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Friday, 19 July 2024

"I'm gonna make you love me"

An Avot baraita for Shabbat (Parashat Balak)

Continuing our series of erev Shabbat posts on the perek of the week, we return to Perek 6.

Readers of a certain age may recall a soul number popularised in the late 1960s by Diana Ross and the Supremes, together with the Temptations. Its title was also a catchy refrain, “I’m gonna make you love me”. While the precise means by which this objective might be achieved lie somewhere beyond the parameters of discussion on Avot Today, the need to be loved occupies an important position in Pirkei Avot.

The first Baraita in Perek 6 opens with the words

כָּל הָעוֹסֵק בַּתּוֹרָה לִשְׁמָהּ זוֹכֶה לִדְבָרִים הַרְבֵּה, וְלֹא עוֹד, אֶלָּא שֶׁכָּל הָעוֹלָם כֻּלּוֹ כְּדַאי הוּא לוֹ. נִקְרָא רֵֽעַ, אָהוּב,

Whoever studies Torah for its own sake merits many things; not only that, but the entire world is worthwhile for him. He is called “friend”, “beloved”...

Avot 6:6 goes even further, listing being loved as one of the 48 things through which a person acquires Torah.

There’s an obvious problem here. While we can love others—whether they love us back or not—there is no mechanism that can be guaranteed to trigger love for us in someone else’s heart. Love is an emotion; it is not subject to rational analysis. How often do we see the heartbreak of lovely souls whose love for another is not reciprocated. So how do we understand these baraitot?

The simplest answer is to say that “beloved” (in Hebrew, ahuv) means “beloved by God”, but this doesn’t solve any problems. Rabbi Akiva (Avot 3:18) has already established that, even if God were to prefer those of us who study Torah for its own sake, we are all still dear to God because we are created in His image. So it must mean something else.

Rabbis Nachman and Natan of Breslov suggest that ahuv here means “loved by oneself”. Strange as this may seem, there is good reason to adopt this view. We are commanded to love others as we love ourselves—and until we love ourselves properly we cannot demonstrate the right level of love for others. However, this still requires us to explain what connection, if any, exists between self-love and (i) learning Torah for its own sake and (ii) the acquisition of Torah per se. Stretching the word ahuv well beyond its normal meaning, R’ Mordechai Frankel-Te’omim (Be’er HaAvot) suggests that it embraces all types of love that a person has for mitzvot between him and God and other people: someone who lacks this quality is by definition lacking in the degree of interest and commitment one needs in one’s learning in order to make it effective. Ultimately, though, it seems to me that we are left with questions we cannot convincingly answer.

Incidentally, these baraitot in Avot are not the only occasions on which being loved is mysteriously and apparently linked with learning Torah. Twice a day, in the paragraph that immediately precedes the recitation of the Shema, we are required to recite a blessing that is a sort of “love sandwich”: it opens with a declaration that we are loved by God and closes with a declaration that we are loved by God. The “filling” in the sandwich is a prayer that God in His mercy should help us to learn His Torah. This invites us to speculate as to why our desire to learn Torah, with God’s assistance if and when it is available, should come wrapped in His love for us. R’ Chaim Friedlander (Siftei Chaim, Rinat Chaim: Bi’urei Tefillah) offers a possible explanation: the greatest act of love that God has shown to us is His gift to us of the Torah: we should seek to reciprocate this demonstration of love by loving Him in return, as the first paragraph of the Shema requires of us.

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