Keeping honour at a distance

Avot 6:6 has a hit-list of criteria that have to be met by anyone who seeks to acquire knowledge of the Torah. There are theoretically 48 such criteria, of which one is to distance oneself from kavod.

Kavod, loosely translated as “honour”, is extensively discussed in Avot -- both in its positive and its negative aspects. But what is its connection to an individual's ability to acquire Torah.

If nothing else, the quest for kavod can be a major distraction. The urge to be honoured can be almost overwhelming, both in the case of those who actually deserve it and for those who believe they do. However, it's not all bad: even if one shouldn't seek it for oneself, it can be a wonderful thing to give to other people.

Apart from unanimously cautioning that honour and the quest for it is dangerous, what else do our Sages say about kavod and the need to keep away from it? Most commentators on Avot have little or nothing to say, since the meaning of this criterion is self-evident. Nevertheless, some later rabbis have added to it. Here are some perspectives.

• Someone who should by now have learned much Torah but hasn’t should not let his sense of lack of kavod distance him from going to the Bet Midrash (House of Study) to carry on learning (Rabbi Chanoch Zundel ben Yosef, Anaf Avot).
• It is best practice to keep kavod distant even when one has earned it and is receiving it from others but to be careful about not making a show of distancing oneself from it in order to flaunt one’s humility (Rabbi Yosef Yavetz).
• On the theme of literally keeping one's distance, one should take a detour rather than walk past people who are sitting down but would have to stand up respectfully if a much honoured person were to pass them (Rabbi Shmuel de Uçeda, Midrash Shmuel).

One aspect of kavod that the commentaries tend not to discuss is the actual process by which a Torah scholar seeks to obtain it.

It is taken as axiomatic that, if you chase after honour, it runs away from you but, if you run away from it – a policy in line with this teaching in Avot – it will seek you out. That however is the theory. In practice there is a blatant asymmetry: while everyone should flee from honour, honour does not run after everyone. In the real world we see for ourselves that honour runs after very few people indeed, and even then it rarely runs, or even breaks into a leisurely trot. Honour often plods after those who deserve it at a snail’s pace, reaching them many years after they have deserved it and sometimes long after they have already died.

But that's not all. Even when honour arrives, it may be the wrong sort of honour: it may be bestowed by someone whose opinion doesn’t count for much. Being honoured by someone you don’t have much respect for may feel almost as bad as not being honoured at all.

A Torah-true student will not fret about whether honour chases after him since that is not why he learns Torah. His glory-seeking colleague will however go through paroxysms of angst, asking himself questions such as: “how can I tell people I deserve honour without actually telling them?” “what means can I deploy to make sure that people notice me when I’m doing all the things I should be honoured for?” and “why am I still not being honoured when I am no worse than others who are?” All of this can be highly distracting for a person who is supposed to be focusing on accumulation of Torah understanding and not seeking honour -- and it will do little to foster the respect he has for others.

Not chasing after honour but keeping it at a respectable distance is not just a message for Torah students. In the secular world we have seen countless instances of people buying, or seeking to buy, medals, titles and positions of power and influence so that others will honour them. Even if they succeed in their acquisition, can they look themselves in the mirror and truly respect themselves.